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Laura: Late Feb/early March...£514. That is all xo
Me: OKAY.
And it was decided. I was going to Bali.
I'd been in a relationship for 7/8 years and I just wanted to be with him, you know? I didn't want to see the world with anyone else. I was happy to exist in our bubble and if we were together nothing else mattered.
And then it was gone.
Just like that.
I was alone.
Facing the world and having absolutely no idea where my place was in it, without him.
emailed: 'You could do worse than escaping to Bali, Megs'.
And she was right. Because that's exactly what it is: escaping - and I'm not ashamed to admit it.
I want to run away from my problems - so what? Yes they'll still be here when I get back etc. etc.
But I'm taking 2015 as my opportunity to say yes. Look at the world with a fresh pair of eyes. With the people who understand.
Just say YES.
Because: life. It passes us by and half the time our eyes aren't even open to the beauty. I believe in fate but I also believe in hard work. On paper I hated 2014 with all of my being and now I have a hunger, to make 2015 completely different.
Of course, for many people simply taking a little trip to Bali is no big deal - but it's something I would've said no to last year. I would've seen it as simply something great for someone else to do.I mean, I definitely wouldn't have wanted to be away from my partner for more time than absolutely necessary - and flying halfway across the world, on my own? No thanks.
Not now.
I'm going to lean in to my fears, take the opportunities that scare me and run with them. Learn to trust that putting myself first isn't such a bad thing and that maybe if I do? I'll be a better friend, lover, companion...you know - just be better at being me. Not the best possible version, but better. That's achievable.
So, Bali. I'll see you soon.
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”- John Lennon
ahh have an amazing time! X
Replyhttp://www.trudyjohanna.co.uk/
Good for you, Megs. I'm really happy to see that you're making 2015 awesome! You deserve it! Can't wait to see and read all about your trip! How long are you going for??
ReplyChrissy x
www.chrissylilly.com
I needed to read this so badly. Thank you xox
ReplyYou'll have the most amazing time in Bali! Such an adventure!
ReplySophie
x
This is such an inspiring post, I am so glad you are taking life by the horns and are embracing a great opportunity!! I hope you have a great time! I also love the first quote pictured so much x
ReplyAbbie|Thoughtsandthunder
How exciting - I'd love to go to Bali.
ReplyLizzie Dripping
You're very very brave. I don't know if you watch Greys Anatomy, I've been obsessed for years.. but there's a quote in a recent episode that I'm trying to live by right now..
ReplyHe's very dreamy. But don't let what he wants eclipse what you need.
I need to work on that. And work on saying yes. I just wish I could do it in Bali too ;D x
I did exactly this after a bad break up, definitely the best thing to do in my eyes! Enjoy girl time, sun and seeing new things - fair play you! xx
Replyfashiontatt.blogspot.com
Oh Megan. :( But just remember... you're a lioness. A fricking warrior! You will get through this bit by bit! Bali will heal your soul for sure.
ReplyFlic x
www.prettyposhohmygosh.com
I agree, just say yes! I'm so excited for you, you're going to have the most incredible time.
ReplySophie x
That's so wonderful to hear Megs! You're going to have an amazing time and it's great being able to say yes to more opportunities- I love that John Lennon quote too!
ReplyEmma xo // Wallflower Wardrobe
You'll have an amazing time Meg - Bali is beautiful!
Replyxx
I like it, never be scared to say yes. And maybe your problems will still be there when you come back, but you won't be the same person, and maybe they'll be easier to deal with.
ReplyWish you an amazing journey!
Eithne on the Moon | Lifestyle, books and travels!
I can imagine ow yor feeling chick, but think it's great your thinking positively. Bali will be fab! And if you can take advice from Lennon, always do, what an amazing man
ReplyLauren
livinginaboxx
How wonderful! Bali is such a gorgeous place, I'm sure you're going to have the best time :)
ReplyTessa at Bramble & Thorn
I really want to go to Bali, can't wait to read all about it! xx
Replyjosie-mayx.blogspot.co.uk
Oh Megs, I'm so happy for you making this decision! You're going to have an amazing time :) x
ReplyMegan / pixiecrop.com
What a lovely post. Really sorry to hear you're having a bit of a rubbish time at the mo, sending many a virtual hug, cuppa T and slab of cake! Bali sounds like a brilliant idea, Bali perfect place to gain some headspace and soak up those rays... and cocktails. It is just a trip, but it makes the world of difference! Speaking of tea and cake, it would be amazing to see ya at the Bloggers Market next Saturday?! Immy Xx
ReplyMegan, you have no idea how much I would like to do this. I can completely relate to the whole relationship thing and being in a BIG bubble. After 5 years my relationship came to a end, incredibly abruptly, I did not see it coming for one minute and then it was all over, in less than a week he had ended it and gone abroad for his job.
ReplyI have to say it has taken me over a year and a half to actually get back to being me yet even now for some reason I still feel under his spell somehow, it's super hard to explain but maybe you can relate,
You seem to have an incredibly supportive network of friends (from what I have seen on Twitter) Laura especially, she seems wonderful. Bali will be amazing and if that's what you need to do in order to escape, have some YOU time then I think that is a completely justifiable reason. I wish I could disappear at times with a friend and just re-evaluate everything! The truth is I only really have one friend yet our lives are very different in so many ways. He was my friend, my best friend and that's one of the saddest things about the whole thing.
One day we will all be old and will look back and wonder why we we're so afraid. I think if we can try to realise that now whilst we are still young maybe we won't have as many regrets later on in life.
This turned into a ridiculously long ramble, I only came here to say have an amazing time :)
Amy x | A Little Boat Sailing
( this is the third time I've wrote this cause it kept deleting itself) ((dedication))
ReplyHere goes:
MATE - THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER!
it's gonna be so sick , you're gonna have the best time! It's been an honour to watch you grow and flourish ( from behind an Internet screen) into the wonderful person you are today ( wonderful you) and I feel proud - and I know that sounds creepy but I don't give a shit. You're doing it for ALL THE WOMENZ - and I'm into that.
Ally
Xxx
www.allyinblunderland.co.uk
I think you're very brave, Megs. Have so much fun in Bali! :)
ReplyI wish you find there piece. Even if when you come, old fears return, you'll change. Wish you fell in love with sand. Wish you dreams, which can be born only when you look on sunset. Whish you wind which can blow away all bad memories.
ReplyHeck yeah!!
ReplyGemma
Faded Windmills
Please pack me in your suitcase :D If Paddington bear can travel all the way from Peru to England on just marmalade, you my dear will be just fine going to Bali :D Love you x x x
ReplyZoe Newlove Beauty Blogger & MUA
I am so proud of you Megs, I hope you find everything your searching for. Your such an inspirational person & you're right, life is about saying yes. :) x
Replywww.hello-cat.blogspot.com
I think I may have commented about this once before but it's amazing the similarities between our current life situations. A few years ago (even though it feels like yesterday) I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years and my life completely changes. He was all I knew and the life we had together was all I knew. I moved out and started over completely, I didn't even take my clothes with me. I just left. Now here I am two years later and after some hard work and redirecting of my life, I'm now preparing to set out on a year long backpacking journey and REALLY start my life. And I can't wait. Girl, say yes to EVERYTHING. You will never look back on your life and be like 'god damn I wish I hadn't gone to Bali that year' but you will most certainly look back and say, 'I wish I'd done more'.
ReplySounds amazing! Wish i had the balls to do that.
ReplyLove this Megs!! I've come out of a long term relationship recently too so I completely get how you're feeling. I just know that Bali is going to be amazing for you! I've just booked to go interrailing in July and I'm far too excited! 2015 is going to be THE year!! Big love xxxx
Replyhttp://rainy-daysblog.blogspot.co.uk/
This sounds amazing, can't wait to hear about your travels!! Running away is never a bad thing. Sometimes it's the best thing that we can do for ourselves. It pushes us to be better
ReplyH x
Good for you lovely! sounds amazing! When are you heading to Bali? I am going there middle of November for a couple of weeks after heading to a friends wedding in Oz! I am super excited but slightly terrified of going by myself! xxx
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